


Words of Wisdom

by angelica



Category: Parks and Recreation
Genre: (i kinda even forgot i wrote half of these), F/M, moving stuff from LJ
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-11
Updated: 2017-04-11
Packaged: 2018-10-17 15:58:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,494
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10597368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelica/pseuds/angelica





	

**Words of Wisdom**   
  


It was the least expected things that were said that remained the longest and in her case, it was what Jerry of all the people had said to her that had brought upon all the terror in Ben Wyatt’s life.

It all started the day after she and Ben announced their engagement to the Parks department. After all the congratulations and celebratory wine (courtesy of Donna) and hugs and tears of joy (from Chris mostly), it was time for words of wisdom.

Chris was the first one to share his opinion after hugging her almost too tightly. “Leslie, this is lit-e-rally the best news I have ever received. You are both incredible, amazing, beautiful people and I love you both and I hope and know you will be very happy. I talked to my therapist about you two and he agrees with me that you will be very happy together. If anything problematic happens, Dr. Nygard also gives support as a couple’s counselor, I can give you his number.”

“Thanks Chris, that is very thoughtful of you but that won’t be necessary.” she replied as politely as she could and made her way to Ron’s office. Ron, as usual, was whittling at his desk.

“Leslie, come on in. I started whittling this for you. It is going to be a wooden arrow head to represent how you and Ben like to shoot into things headfirst.”

“Like that Sylvia Plath quote? We want to shoot off in all directions like the colored arrows from a Fourth of July rocket?” Leslie suggested.

“I don’t know who that woman is, but it sounds about right.” he stopped his whittling and looked at Leslie. “Since neither of you is named Tammy, I can’t see why this marriage will not work.”

“Thank you Ron.” she said and left the room when she saw Ron reaching out for the remote control she had given him for Christmas last year.

On her way to her new office, Tom appeared next her. “Ben is not Canadian, right?” he asked as he walked next to her.

“No, he is from Minnesota.” Leslie replied.

“I just wanted to make sure he wasn’t marrying you for a green card like my ex-wife. You are two nerds in love and you will be two nerds in holy matrimony.” he said and disappeared as quickly as he appeared.

When she was finally in her office, only twenty minutes from getting off to go pick up their bed with Ben, Leslie found herself cornered by Jerry.

“Leslie, you have no idea how happy I am for you. I appreciate what you have done for me in the hospital so Gale and my beautiful daughters wanted to give you and Ben this as an engagement present.” he said and handed Leslie a small box. She opened the box only to find a whistle in it.

“Um, thanks Jerry, this is really thoughtful of you.” she told him, unable to find any other positive thing to say.

“I know you are now living in your new house together and you don’t have any furniture yet and burglars love empty-looking houses and I’m sure Ben doesn’t play baseball and doesn’t have a bat so have the whistle and use it when necessary.” Jerry said earnestly and almost out of breath. Leslie looked at him, wondering how he had been able to stay married for so long. Since he was the only one she knew who had been married the longest, she decided that Jerry would have the answers for marriage. “Safety is really important Leslie. Is Ben the kind of guy who wakes up to go after a noise he hears in the dark or does he stay in bed with you? The man you are marrying should be the kind who goes after the noise. Gale and I stay in bed, we don’t want trouble.”

Driving home, Leslie thought about what Jerry told her. His gift – a whistle, a freaking whistle? – made no sense but what he told about what kind Ben was made her wonder. It was true that together they jumped into the unknown, like Ron suggested. In the literal sense, Leslie herself was one who would go after the slightest noise in her house with the heaviest object she could find even though it would usually the newspaper piles in her living room falling down. She could not remember a time when Ben had offered to protect her the way Jerry had described. Sure he had punched a guy for her, but would he tackle a burglar? She did not want to Ben and herself to be like Jerry and Gale and stay in bed until danger was gone. She wanted to know for sure that Ben would chase away any danger for her.

And that was how she had manipulated April and Andy on short notice to come to their new house after midnight to scare Ben so that she could see how Ben reacted first hand. It was a simple plan, she had given them keys to the house and they were going to arrive after Ben and she had gone to bed and make noise.

She had followed Ben to bed with a knowing smile and as usual, as sleeping was not being her best friend like Ann, she was lying awake while Ben was sleeping next to her. It was just a few minutes after midnight when she heard noises coming from downstairs. She never thought Andy and April would be so prompt yet came to the conclusion that giving away all of her Sweetums candy was good incentive for them.

She waited for them to make some proper noise before poking Ben. When their noises became almost annoying, she started poking Ben to wake him up. Quite opposite to her, Ben was actually a heavy sleeper so it took her almost a minute to get Ben to open his eyes. Upon instinct Ben leaned over and turned on their new lamp.

“There is a noise coming from downstairs.” Leslie whispered to him.

Ben rubbed his eyes with the back of his hands, trying to wake up properly. “Okay, stay here, I’ll go check.” he said after placing a quick peck on her temple. Leslie started smiling immediately. Ben had passed the test. She wanted to stop him or go after him, but she also rather wanted to see his butt walk away from him into the darkness. So she stayed in bed with the knowing smile – the Ben she was going to marry was perfect in every way.

What she didn’t expect was to hear police sirens next.

She immediately leapt from the bed and ran downstairs. She wished that they had actually bought some more lamps so she could see her way but her eyes were able to adjust to the darkness immediately and the blue and red lights outside were lighting her way anyway.

She found herself at the spot where Ben had proposed to her only a few days ago, staring at Andy and April standing by the fireplace and Ben lying on the floor with a policeman standing above him. The whole scene felt something out of a random book.

“Ma’am, we received a call from your neighbors about two suspects entering your house. We found the suspects but this happened.” The policeman said to her pointing at Ben. Leslie had no idea what was happening.

“We did as you told us, Leslie but then Ben found us and while we were talking the police arrived and he got terrified.” Andy explained.

“I’m sorry Officer but there has been a misunderstanding, we are not being robbed, these are my friends.” Leslie told the officer whose name she had momentarily forgotten and then kneeled to check up on Ben. “Honey, it is okay. I’m so sorry, this is entirely my fault.”

Ben lifted his head to look at her and was relieved to see that the policeman and the police car outside were gone. “This has been the scariest night of my life. First I found Andy and April making out in our kitchen then a cop barged through the back door with a gun.”

“I was trying to test out something Jerry told me, I’m sorry.” Leslie told him as she helped him to his feet. “You passed the test.”

“You almost killed your boyfriend trying to follow the advice of old people. Jerry of all the people.” April commented. Leslie could not help but agree but was unwilling to admit it.

This time Andy was the one to give the word of wisdom. “The most important thing in a marriage is to love and support each other no matter what.”

Looking at her _fiancé_ who was standing at the same spot where he proposed to her, Leslie decided that sometimes the best words of wisdom came from those who didn’t seem to have it.


End file.
